This part of the mehndi is the best part about any Pakistani wedding so I thought it deserved it’s own post. Anyone who attends a mehndi is only coming to watch the dances that are prepared by both sides of the family. This is basically a dance off between the two sides to see which side can come up with better dances. After the dances are over, the floor is open for anyone to join in! Some mehndi’s last till about 4 or 5 in the morning.
Month: March 2019
Mehndi Pt. 1
The Mehndi is probably the most anticipated event for almost everybody attending a Pakistani wedding. This event is generally hosted by the bride’s family where they host a night of color, music and dance to celebrate the nuptials of their loved ones. The grooms family enters the wedding hall and is greeted by the bride’s family. They will be entering with large trays that will hold gifts for the bride for her wedding. They will enter with the bridal outfit, her jewellery, and small gifts for the bride as she will be entering her new home. The groom sits on stage where he is anticipating the arrival of his new bride. The bride will enter the event either on top of a Dholi, which is a wooden object where the bride is seated and is carried by men into the event. Another option for the bride to enter the event would be under a bed of flowers or a long material. Close male family members would hold the end of these. The bride will enter with her bridesmaids, whom each will be carrying small tea light candles or big trays filled with sweets and treats. The groom will leave the stage and come receive the bride from her family and take her to their seats. Straight away, the families will start the traditions, also known as the rasams. The families with each go up to the bride and groom and take some money and make a round of the bride and groom and feed them a smarty as this will be taking out all the bad omens for the bride and groom. The money will be given to charity at the end of the night. After all the family members completed this tradition, dinner is served. The food at this event is traditional Pakistani Street food which is served throughout the night. Immediately after dinner, the guests are told to take their seats as the dances will be beginning shortly.
Dholki
The dholki’s are held almost everyday starting two to three weeks before the wedding. There are different types of dholki depending on who is throwing it. Close family members or friends would usually host an event like this in honor of the bride and groom. Some dholki’s are extremely casual where the close family and friends practice coordinated dances to perform at the mehndi. Traditionally, the groom’s family and bride’s family host these event separately so the dances will remain a surprise.
Throughout the dholki, Bollywood music is playing. At a certain point, the elder women of the family get together in a circle and play the dhol (Indian Drum) and tambourines to old traditional Bollywood wedding songs. The youngsters also chime in and join the fun.
You need to dress for this occasion according to the size of the event. If it’s small casual one, you can even get away with wearing western casual clothes but if it is big you would need to wear eastern semi formal wear. The dholki’s usually get bigger closer the wedding dates.
Mehndi Lagayi (Henna Application)
The Mehndi Lagayi is an event where all the women come together and apply henna on their hands in order to celebrate the wedding. The house is decorated in beautiful flowers, the bride is dressed super simple as it is her last couple of days before she is known as a married woman. The bride usually applies henna all the way up to her elbows and puts it on her feet as well. In henna design, the artist leaves the initials of the groom and as per tradition, the groom is supposed to find it on his wedding night.
Other close family members and friends apply mehndi on all four sides of their hands and some even apply it on the feet.
To this event, you would definitely wear something eastern but not too fancy. At this event the traditional dish daal chawaal (yellow lentils with rice) is served as it is simple, easy to eat and delicious along with other traditional Pakistani sweets.
Mayun
The second event that takes place is the mayun. The mayun is an ubtan ceremony where the bride and groom are covered in a tumeric paste to make their complexion glow. The bride and groom are fed some traditional Pakistani sweets known as mithai. To this event, you should opt to wear yellow or orange as that is the color that represents the paste. After the traditions are done. The boys friends take the groom and throw eggs and other items on him. This tradition is called a pithi.
The Milad
The milad is the first event that takes place at a Pakistani wedding. This event is for women only where women from both sides come together to offer prayers and blessings to the new bride. Islamic chants are performed and all the women come together and pray for the the couple.
The bride is dressed quite simply, and as a guest one should dress simply too. To a milad, I would opt to wear an outfit with pastels rather than go for something dark and loud as it will take away from the entire aesthetic.
After the prayers are over, the men will come and join the women for dinner.
Emaan’s Guide to Pakistani Weddings 